Timeline

 There really are no words, or titles, for the last six months or so...actually it has been almost a year that time seemed to shudder on its axis and then move again with no shape or rhythm.  The stilted stops and starts have been maddening under normal circumstances, but the last seven to eight months have been unreal.  So an anecdotal accounting of happenings:

  • The world came to a screeching halt mid-March.  In that month (just prior to everything unfolding) I would take what may very well have been my last trip with my Mom, up to Virginia.  We stayed in a yurt and it was a great time. Soon after mid-March, I was laid off due to the shut downs, and I mourned this loss because it was more than a job - they are family.  It was probably just as well because at the end of March we learned we would become grandparents (this was something of a miracle as we weren't sure was possible).  
  • Two things were reasons for a move away from the Gulf would happen: grandchildren and ailing parents.  Two weeks later, I would learn that my Mom was diagnosed with stage 4, inoperable cancer.  
  • It is truly hard to describe all that I felt as things began to change so rapidly - seeing beach entrances chained and roped off (those didn't stop me), businesses shuttered, people all of a sudden afraid of each other. Layered by all of this, was the understanding that time at the Gulf was coming to a close.
  • Our house for sale where we lived went under contract, and had I known about the crazy housing market, might have just stayed put.
  • Began the process of splitting time wrapping up in the Gulf and getting the house prepared for new owners.
  • Mid-June, 2020 officially rolled away from beach life.  Little did we know, we had C-vid at this same time.  I stayed behind a few days to finish up emptying out the condo (and let's be honest - eek out every ounce of more time in proximity to the shore), and began to feel ill on the 9 hour drive up.  At first, thought it was due to a tub painting project using some extremely toxic paint. But the symptoms were classic and followed the distinct pattern.   So essentially we moved TWICE in the two weeks from leaving the beach and then finishing up clearing out and cleaning up a house to sell, and moving out of there too, all WHILE having the virus.  This was confirmed in August with an antibody test. 
  • From that point set forth MONTHS of hopping from place-to-place, much by the generosity of family while relentlessly searching for a new home.  My parents' house, brother-in-law's lake house, camper (twice - once for a whole month in October), "house sitting", a couple of stints at extended resort places nearby.  This was a period of much challenge, heartbreak (4 contracts falling through and MANY houses going under contract before a showing could even be scheduled), exhaustion, stress-inducing issues from the people that bought my house (resolved), uncertainty, etc.  From July to November - not having a place to live. 
  • The search, originally with the intent to be on water somewhere, created a web that stretched east, north, west and even south into a couple of other states that would mean possibly a state away, but never more than about a 45 or 50 minute commute.  God has a sense of humor.
  • Mid-October a house with "a lot of character" came up and a contract was made - and then the problems surfaced, including hidden mold - my root cause to many issues - and nulled that one fast.  Only days later, our realtor sent a new listing, literally 34 minutes old - jumped on it to see - that evening.....something about this one, this place.  It was the place - unique.  Unlike anywhere in the area.  My realtor said - "Nothing like it here in this area.  A coastal, New England coast feel."  And it stuck.
  • God has a sense of humor - this place is, as the crow flies, less than a mile 'that way' from the other house.  The same creek my children ventured into and played in is the very same creek that runs right beside and on this property.  My restless heart said 'anywhere out there', and God said - 'Right back here.'
  • Edited addition - The house closing occurred the day my daughter went into labor.  It was always the plan for me to be a part of her birth team - she had a home birth.  She is brave like that. :)  Bravest person I know.  She had the baby on moving day, so to say the end of Nov (20th) through the holidays were a blur is an understatement.  
  • First granddaughter born November 2020
January 2021
  • My MIL has now also been diagnosed stage 4 pancreatic cancer.  My Mom is not doing too great.  It is all just unbelievable.  
  • An aside - I am sure my immune system was sorely compromised - I fell ill February 2021 for over a week - like 105 temperatures, body aches, hallucinations, respiratory junk that lasted for-ev-er.  I stayed sick - like cough, respiratory through the fall and into the 'winter of illness and death' - I SURVIVED!!!
  • Update March 29th - my mom is now on hospice.
  • My Mom passed April 7, 2021 - NO ONE prepares you for losing your Mom, no matter the circumstances.
  • I got into some poison ivy in June and endured the most maddening, excruciating physical pain and challenge I've ever exprienced.  
  • Familial issues.....all I'll say here.
  • Suspected but unbeknownst to us - my MIL's last Christmas with us......December 2021.
  • Me....STILL sick.  Just working despite and through it - in the school system.  This would be my last dip of a toe into the educational complex.... it is not longer for me.  That chapter ends.
  • Learn another grandchild is on the way.  (Somewhere in FEB,MAR of 2022)
  • Started a new job unrelated to education.
  • THIRD grandchild on the way (March 2022 - due Oct.28 2022)
  • MAJOR marital issues (throughout the summer)
  • Second granddaughter born July 2022
  • MIL goes on hospice - declines rapidly
  • Spent 2+weeks with my in-laws while my MIL moved toward the light that drew her HOME.  She left for home Oct. 6, 2022.
  • Navigating my own grief (all over again) along with my spouse's
  • 3rd granddaughter born end of Oct. 2022 - a blessing to get to be present
  • Descent back into the familiar cavern of depression - aaaaaannnnnnddddd here I am still. 


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